On Saturday I sat inside all day, working away, while the sun shinned the brightest it has in 2015. I counted down the hours until my extra work day was done and as soon as it was time to go I called H and told him to come meet me for a little stroll in the forest (aka the Forbidden forest as me and Ms England like to call it) near my work. I didn’t even care that I was in heels, I was walking outside and enjoying the last bit of sun no matter what!
As H and I were walking we began talking about our summer holiday travel plans. We need to finalize what we are doing soon, as it is already March (wow time flies by!) but I am finding myself at a bit of a crossroad.
In January when I first came back to Iceland after an amazing trip back to Oregon I was a homesick mess. It was so difficult to say goodbye to my family again, the only thing keeping me going was the thought that I would be seeing them as soon as my summer holiday started.
Now, a few months have gone by, it has gotten a bit easier to be away from home again, and I am wondering if going back home for my summer holiday is truly what I want to do.
My feelings of uncertainty about going home this summer have absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I don’t want to see my family. I miss them everyday and wish that they lived down the street from me so I could stop by anytime. Even the thought of not seeing my family for possibly another year absolutely breaks my heart.
Here is where the dilemma comes into play.
It is ridiculously expensive to fly home! Like the same price as a two week trip somewhere else in Europe just for the flight ticket home expensive.
Looking at tickets lately I can’t help but wonder if I should be using my money for other travels. My home and family will always be there but right now is my time to travel as much as possible, right?
Whenever I go to make a decision though I quickly come up with a reason why I should chose the other option. My thought process is a little something like this…
I want to travel to new places this summer, but I also really want to go home and see my family.
I want to lay out on the beach in Spain, and I also want to go swimming in the pool in my parents backyard with my sisters.
I want to visit Turkey and go shopping in the colorful markets, and I really want to have a shopping date with my mom at our local farmers market.
As H likes to say, I want to have everything and comprise nothing. This is completely true and this is what I like to call the expat dilemma.
When I think about going home this summer I also start wondering about what the next few years look like. Currently we have no idea when we will be heading back state side, but what if I do end up moving back to Oregon in the next year or two and traveling to Europe will no longer be as cheap or possible? Will I regret all those holidays I spent traveling right back to the place I grew up and all the new places I missed out on? Or will I regret not visiting home this summer and be in tears by the end of the summer thinking of how long it will be until I see my family again?
Expat life can be so full of challenges. I know I shouldn’t be complaining, since either way this summer will include some fun travel plans, but can’t I just have it all!
Really this post is just a long ramble of what is currently happening in my brain. I am feeling a large pull in both directions and I have no idea what side will win. If only I could just have all my family by my side and we could travel the world together, that would be the dream. For now, I will just have to deal with this expat dilemma and enjoy which ever direction I chose.
PS. Isn’t the area next to my work so pretty. I just love sunny days outside!
Question of the Day?
To my fellow expats, do you ever deal with having to decide between traveling more or going home? How do you handle it? Where is good to visit in Europe during July?
